An unusaul and wonderful thing happened to me today – I felt appreciated.  Who knew that a yearly performance evaluation at work could lift my spirits so much?  In the 18+ years of my professional career, I’ve had numerous reviews of my work, and all have been largely positive.  But never before have I skipped away, paper copy in hand, like a kindergarten student who earned her first star of merit.  What made the difference this time?  Motherhood.

Most mothers can list all the ways they ‘fail’ their families.  If they can’t, just ask the children; they’ll be happy to enlighten you.  Rare is the occasion that you hear a mother say, “I feel so appreciated.”  The work of motherhood can be thankless drudgery with little positive feedback.

All people, young and old, need to feel that their contributions are purposeful and valued.   When you feel appreciated, you want to do more or try even harder.  Positive feedback is a classic motivator. 

If no one has told you lately how magnificent you are, try these suggestions:

1.  Appreciate yourself.  You can’t expect others to appreciate what you take for granted in yourself.  Give yourself a well-deserved pat on the back for your efforts.
2. Appreciate someone else.  Give and you shall receive.
3. Start an appreciation tradition in your house.  At dinner, place a special plate at someone’s seat.  Invite everyone to say one thing they appreciate about that person.  Rotate the plate nightly or weekly.
4. If your family still fails to throw acknowledgement in your direction, ask for what you need.  Be a mature example of what it means to express yourself in a constructive manner.

Good luck.  And by the way, thank you for all you did today.